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  1. #886
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    Hey thanks a lot Daniel Brian Mobley. I actually snuck in just before the deadline, it's just that I submitted an incomplete entry. Thanks for taking a look at the pages and for the feedback. I will try to take a look at your script when I get chance!

  2. #887
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    "Getting published in comics has never been simultaneously easier and harder than it is now," Hawkins told CBR sumitomo connector
    Last edited by Claonnie; 06-04-2015 at 11:55 PM.

  3. #888
    Writer/Cartoonist Daniel Brian Mobley's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Claonnie View Post
    "Getting published in comics has never been simultaneously easier and harder than it is now," Hawkins told CBR
    Indeed....yep. Indeed.

  4. #889

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    Rejected script! Better luck next year.

    https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B1h...ew?usp=sharing

  5. #890
    Newbie Member WaddyisOsvaldo's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by KY Matty View Post
    Hey guys! Congratulations to all of the winners! I would have posted much earlier, but my computer has been on the fritz and I have been absurdly busy. I'm looking forward to next year, especially having a heads up on the material. I will post my script on here soon, I just don't have time right now.
    Here's to hoping this thread stays alive. I've thoroughly enjoyed it.
    Rock on and good luck on the next Talent Hunt!
    KY Matty and all my other fellow Talent Hunt losers -- let's not squander all the hard work and good will we've invested here. This is a call for us to use this experience to become better writers, to crack the code and to figure out why we didn't win. What made our scripts lesser-than? What will make us winners? The best way to do this is to have others rip our work. Then we should go back and dissect our stories once more, after they've been critiqued. Let's tinker, learn from our mistakes, embrace what worked and come back next year to win this thing.
    I propose we start a program of Pay-It-Forward critiquing. I've written up a brief critique of KY Matty's script and posted it below. All I ask in return is that KY Matty write up a critique of someone else's work posted on this site. It doesn't have to be too in depth, but try to give some constructive feedback. For the rest of you, if you have your work critiqued, you should in turn, critique someone else's. Or better yet, even if you haven't had your work critiqued, click on one of the script links in this thread and read/critique one right now.
    Of course, critiques should be respectful, but we also shouldn't feel like we have to pull punches either. What do you say? Let's dig in and make our failure count for something. And with that, I give you my critique of "Tsin-Tsen's Inferno" by Matt Rogers.

    I considered doing a Tsin story for my entry. He’s a great character and I think you’ve done a very nice job of telling a powerful emotional story here that pushes this character forward in interesting ways.
    In a general sense, I think the dialogue/captions are a bit stilted, while it’s tough to put my finger on why sometimes. However, below I’ve pulled out a few examples.

    On page 2, I don’t know what these demons look like. It may be my unfamiliarity with the Witchblade universe, but at least a little description would have been nice for me. … I think some of Tsin’s exposition is a bit extemporaneous. There are times when you can write a bit tighter. And other times, when I feel you can open up wider and make your descriptions bigger and more vivid for the artist to inspire your artist.

    I like the opening fight scene. It’s crisp, and his voice over about being an improv artist guides us nicely though it. That moment when he snaps the demon’s neck, “*CRACKLE*” — great stuff. (A style note, you should keep to the present tense in your action if that’s the tense you’re working in. PAGE 3, Panel 4 should have read: Tsin snaps the demon’s neck.)


    Your panel count is off on Page 7. Personally, I consider these kinds of things minor mistakes that an editor or artist can easily catch and fix. But some people get mental over this kind of thing.


    Write tight, ie: Page 7 Panel 2: “Over Father’s shoulder the swords hang on the wall in the background.” They’re over his shoulder on the wall — we can assume it’s in the background, unless the artist has a better way of showing it. Nevertheless, I really like this page, with “flame tongues licking the ceiling from off of (Mali’s) body.”

    Page 12, I like the echoes of the back-story we just left behind on the previous page.

    I think the writing can be a bit stilted at times, where the dialogue can sound more conversational, the captions more crisp, and the descriptions more detailed and immersive. Here’s an example from Page 17: Panel 2: “Mali stands in a gateway that is surrounded by fiery fog. Above his head is the bottom half of a sign reading, “ye who enter here.”
    This is a great image, and I think you can feed your artist a lot more here, and then of course, let him or her riff off of what your imagination conjures. Tell me more about Mali? What emotion is imprinted on his face? Is he hunched about to pounce or grasping at pillars to hold him up – still run down from his last run-in with Tsin or is he running his fingers through his hair like Jennifer Beals doing the dance to “Maniac?” That sign that he’s stepping on, is it wrought iron? I assume it is, but tell me. I think there are a lot of opportunities throughout for even more descriptive or engaging writing that are squandered.

    All in all however, I think this story is well structured and entertaining and I enjoyed reading it. I think you could definitely be among the 40.

  6. #891
    Newbie Member WaddyisOsvaldo's Avatar
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    Oh, and here's the link to my losing script: https://drive.google.com/file/d/0ByZ...ew?usp=sharing

    It's an Aphrodite IX story that takes place in between the recent Aphrodite IX nine-issue series and IXth Generation. Enjoy.

    (For every review/critique I receive, I'll give one —*not necessarily in return, but I will critique one of the losing scripts posted on this thread.)

  7. #892
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    OK, Magdalena fans (I hope there is at least one of you among this group), here is my script. I've never used Google Drive before, so I hope I'm doing this right:

    https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B8Q...ew?usp=sharing

    Admittedly I haven't read any other scripts except for MonkeyPants', and I rather enjoyed his team-up of Witchblade and Magdalena in his "Cold War" story. I was brand new to the Top Cow Universe last November when I heard about this contest and I gravitated toward Magdalena because of my affinity for the Spear of Destiny. I wrote this in a manner that I hoped would be consistent with Magdalena's world, but also easy enough for a new reader to pick up and read with the use of informative, establishing captions.

    Appreciate any feedback.

    Also, I was invited by the inventor of "Free Comic Book Day" to have a table at his sidewalk mini-con for Indie creators in the Bay Area. He said Top Cow's local marketing guy and a former Talent Hunt winner will be there too. If I remember, I'll try take a picture with those dudes and post here for you all to see.

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  9. #894
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    I thought just Athena IX and Apollo IX were getting One Shots, but it looks like Poseidon IX and Artemis IX are getting them too.

    If anyone hasn't picked up the hardcover of Aphrodite IX yet, then you should.

    Lots of good background information. It includes the David Wohl original series which has some great characters (Abraxis is visually really interesting) and some interesting plot points which have yet to be picked up in the latest series.

    My copy arrived over the weekend. I'd read all the Rebirth stuff but I had really wanted to get a look at the previous series too (given that it is at least partially in continuity).

    Plenty of cool things to research.

  10. #895
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    Long-time lurker, first-time poster.

    I had entered the contest this year in the writer category but sadly did not make it. For your amusement, I put the script up on my website.

    http://wp.me/p2LSmi-dS

  11. #896
    Rookie Member KY Matty's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by WaddyisOsvaldo View Post
    KY Matty and all my other fellow Talent Hunt losers -- let's not squander all the hard work and good will we've invested here. This is a call for us to use this experience to become better writers, to crack the code and to figure out why we didn't win. What made our scripts lesser-than? What will make us winners? The best way to do this is to have others rip our work. Then we should go back and dissect our stories once more, after they've been critiqued. Let's tinker, learn from our mistakes, embrace what worked and come back next year to win this thing.
    I propose we start a program of Pay-It-Forward critiquing. I've written up a brief critique of KY Matty's script and posted it below. All I ask in return is that KY Matty write up a critique of someone else's work posted on this site. It doesn't have to be too in depth, but try to give some constructive feedback. For the rest of you, if you have your work critiqued, you should in turn, critique someone else's. Or better yet, even if you haven't had your work critiqued, click on one of the script links in this thread and read/critique one right now.
    Of course, critiques should be respectful, but we also shouldn't feel like we have to pull punches either. What do you say? Let's dig in and make our failure count for something. And with that, I give you my critique of "Tsin-Tsen's Inferno" by Matt Rogers.

    I considered doing a Tsin story for my entry. He’s a great character and I think you’ve done a very nice job of telling a powerful emotional story here that pushes this character forward in interesting ways.
    In a general sense, I think the dialogue/captions are a bit stilted, while it’s tough to put my finger on why sometimes. However, below I’ve pulled out a few examples.

    On page 2, I don’t know what these demons look like. It may be my unfamiliarity with the Witchblade universe, but at least a little description would have been nice for me. … I think some of Tsin’s exposition is a bit extemporaneous. There are times when you can write a bit tighter. And other times, when I feel you can open up wider and make your descriptions bigger and more vivid for the artist to inspire your artist.

    I like the opening fight scene. It’s crisp, and his voice over about being an improv artist guides us nicely though it. That moment when he snaps the demon’s neck, “*CRACKLE*” — great stuff. (A style note, you should keep to the present tense in your action if that’s the tense you’re working in. PAGE 3, Panel 4 should have read: Tsin snaps the demon’s neck.)


    Your panel count is off on Page 7. Personally, I consider these kinds of things minor mistakes that an editor or artist can easily catch and fix. But some people get mental over this kind of thing.


    Write tight, ie: Page 7 Panel 2: “Over Father’s shoulder the swords hang on the wall in the background.” They’re over his shoulder on the wall — we can assume it’s in the background, unless the artist has a better way of showing it. Nevertheless, I really like this page, with “flame tongues licking the ceiling from off of (Mali’s) body.”

    Page 12, I like the echoes of the back-story we just left behind on the previous page.

    I think the writing can be a bit stilted at times, where the dialogue can sound more conversational, the captions more crisp, and the descriptions more detailed and immersive. Here’s an example from Page 17: Panel 2: “Mali stands in a gateway that is surrounded by fiery fog. Above his head is the bottom half of a sign reading, “ye who enter here.”
    This is a great image, and I think you can feed your artist a lot more here, and then of course, let him or her riff off of what your imagination conjures. Tell me more about Mali? What emotion is imprinted on his face? Is he hunched about to pounce or grasping at pillars to hold him up – still run down from his last run-in with Tsin or is he running his fingers through his hair like Jennifer Beals doing the dance to “Maniac?” That sign that he’s stepping on, is it wrought iron? I assume it is, but tell me. I think there are a lot of opportunities throughout for even more descriptive or engaging writing that are squandered.

    All in all however, I think this story is well structured and entertaining and I enjoyed reading it. I think you could definitely be among the 40.
    Hey man, I really appreciate you workshopping my script. I was hoping that this thread might turn into something like this. Time permitting, I intend to pay it forward.
    I agree about more description with Mali's face. I'm not sure about the description of the demons though. I intentionally left that obscure because I was thinking in terms of not wanting to step on an artists toes. But, I can see how more description would add to the script. That may depend on the artist that the writer is working with.
    I absolutely agree with consistency in tense. I'm actually a little embarrassed. That's amateur. But, that's why there are editors and my description wouldn't go in the book anyway. I wouldn't mind you being a little more specific about where my writing feels forced.
    I do hope I am among the top 40. But it's probably best that I don't know. It wouldn't change what I do. I would still submit more writing. Knowing if I made the top 40 would only serve to give me one of two differences in mentality: "I've almost got this" vs "Why do I keep doing this to myself?" Either way as long as my mind and body will let me, I will be submitting writing.
    This is my first chance to respond to this (weeks later). Once I have the time I will workshop your script and workshop whoever else wants notes.
    Again, I appreciate it and I appreciate the professionalism. All of your criticism was constructive.
    Holla!

  12. #897
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    I'm curious if this is the same thread that will be used for the 2016 talent search starting on Sept. 15th 2015 and ending in 2016. If not, is there one set up yet? Thanks.

  13. #898
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    I just want to point out how fantastic Top Cow continues to be about this Talent Hunt. if you download the new 2016 Talent Hunt rules, you can read the scripts for four new Top Cow comics. I know they're intended for artists, but they're invaluable for writers. For example, if you purchase the brand-new, excellent Athena IX #1 by Ryan Cady and Phillip Sevy, you can immediately compare it to Ryan's original script. And the fact that anyone who submits by January 15 will get a one-paragraph written review/feedback? Wow. No other comic book company is doing this. I hope everybody takes advantage of this opportunity.

  14. #899
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    Regarding the most current Talent Hunt (to end in 2016) I downloaded all the submission guidelines, but cannot find a clear explanation of how much art a contestant should submit. It says that they are accepting just pencils, or pencils and ink, etc. but it never says "5 pages of art need to be submitted" or anything like that. Under "Writers", it specifies an exact page count for a script, but I can't find anything on how much art. Can anyone clear that up?

  15. #900
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    Hi all,

    Newbie here in CBR and I just saw the post about the new Talent Hunt 2015-2016 coming this fall, I just have a few questions about it, if anyone knows the answer.

    One of the sample scripts they provided has 21 pages.

    For artists, is the full 21 pages required?

    If the whole script isn't required, how many pages, minimum, are required for submission for the Talent Hunt?

    Are digital pencils/ink fine?

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